I, For One, Welcome Our Robot Overlord

Three figures emerged from the recently landed spacecraft.

“We’ve made it! A new world,” declared one. “As the senior officer, I will rule our new civilisation.”

Breakdown

“Hello, you’ve reached the AA. What’s your emergency?”

“Hi. I’ve been space truckin’ for 2000 light years in my interplanetary craft and was about to re-enter Earth’s stratosphere when my thrusters failed.”

It All Depends On Where You’re Standing

Everyone on Earth remembers the day the oceans dried up. Or should that be emptied?
The sudden darkness as a colossal spaceship appeared above the Pacific.
The destructive tsunamis created by vast pipes plunged into the ocean.
The deafening roar as almost all Earth’s seas were siphoned away.
A planet destroyed. All in one day.

Hypersplat!

“Daddy, what’s that mess on the view screen?” Jenny turned to her father, Space Captain Bobby Starshine.

“We’re in hyperspace. It always looks like that,” he answered, without looking up from the control panel.

Jenny wrinkled her nose in disgust, “Well I think it looks like alien vomit or loads of squished insects.”

The Art Collector

Everyone remembers the day The Art Collector arrived. His vast spaceship suddenly appearing in geostationary orbit above Tokyo.

And who can forget that grandiose speech, broadcast in every language?

Captain Starshine Invites You On A Trip In His Astrocharabanc

Welcome ladies and gents. Hello you boys and girls.
We’re going on a journey that’s out of this world.

So we’ll say goodbye to the planet of your birth.
That overcrowded, blue green planet known as Earth.

The End

“I said ‘IT’S OCCUPIED!'”

The knocking stopped abruptly, followed by a booming voice. “Well what are you doing in there?”

“Minding my own business!”

“You do know I’m Captain McAllister? I ask again, what’re you doing in there? It’s been nearly an hour!”